I had holes in my socks; my shoes had windows and doors in them, my winter jacket had seen better days. My life was as beautiful as my one and only stone-washed jeans. The only pair I had been wearing every day for the past year.
Through the streets, I walked my imaginary dog. No one noticed me as I tried to navigate my way through the crowded alleys. For one minute, I thought I was dead, I thought my spirit was just hovering around the streets, but then a ball hit my head and I fell to the ground. I felt the pain.
A teenage boy crossed the street, jumped over my body and ran into the bush to pick the ball. What have I been reduced to? Have I become so invisible? – These were the questions that were running through my head as I lay on the wet ground. The smell of urine mixed with burnt-out cigarette sticks did not permit me to get to the gates of heaven, I was really wishing to see.
I searched for my imaginary dog as I struggled to get up from the ground. The dog was nowhere to be found. “Even my imaginary dog has left me”, I said to myself. People kept on walking by in groups; laughing, drinking and having fun. “I was once like them. I used to have a life”, I shouted out in tears as I started to shiver. The fall had ripped my very fragile winter jacket. The cold wind kept blowing against my face as I walked up the street.
I saw them across the street. My friends with whom I had spent my good days, the ones I tried to impress, the ones under whose pressure I was suppressed, the ones I put first before myself. I waved and shouted as I ran towards them but they could neither see nor hear me. I could remember back then when I felt I was an outsider, I tried all my best to feel among, to be one of the cool kids. The little light, I had at that time, blew out while I was trying to fit in, trying to figure out myself, trying to find myself. Now, these friends don’t even know if I exist anymore. I sadly watched them as they were talking and laughing as if everything was okay as if I was not missing from the group.
I walked away with the dark cloud hovering over me. How did I get here? I must have been so blind to see the red flags! Didn’t anyone warn me? I must have been so deaf and stubborn to listen to them. I stumbled, a couple of times on the road because I could not see clearly. Everyone around me was walking freely and they all seem to know where they were heading to. I kept on picking myself up every time I fell.
Suddenly, I saw a little strange light burning at the end of the street. Since I had no other place to go, I tried to find my way towards this light. A little voice in my head told me not to go there; it told me that I was doing just fine on the path I was on. But that was obviously a lie, I was frustrated and had lost all hope.
It was a little chapel at the end of a narrow alley. The abandoned path to the chapel was empty and rugged. I had to climb a broken fence, walk sideways in between two walls and climb up a hill. The little light became brighter as I approached the chapel. I found the entrance to the chapel. The huge doors were wide open and the light was almost blinding. “Are these the gates of Heaven I have always heard about?”, I asked myself.
Just as I was about to enter into the chapel, I heard a loud scream from the dark alley and the voice said, “Come back to me! I own you! You will always crawl back to me anyways! I will give you everything you desire!!” That voice was familiar. I had heard those promises before. I got everything I ever wanted but they were taken back from me.
As I stepped into the chapel, the dark cloud, which had been hovering over me, disappeared. The chapel was bigger than it looked from outside. There were huge pillars along both sides of the aisle. I could not see the roof; all I saw were white clouds and bright light. I felt ashamed of myself because everywhere was sparkling with gold and diamond, everyone was dressed gloriously and I was standing in the aisle in my dirty stinking clothing looking mesmerized.
An old lady sitting on one of the benches looked at me, smiled and faced another direction. I searched around for a minute to see if she smiled at someone else, but there was no one else besides me.
I shouted, “She can see me!” as I ran towards the altar.
“Of course, we can see you”, said a voice from above.
I looked up and saw nothing else but the bright glowing light.
“Welcome, son”, said the voice. “What happened to you? Where is your light? What happened to your glory?”
I bowed down because I could not look in the direction from which the voice was coming. “I lost it all. My light blew off! I was trying to please the world, but the world dissed me! Have mercy on me! Please help me, father!!”
“What would you like me to do for you?”, asked the voice calmly.
“I want my light back. Please, light up my world! I am tired of the darkness that keeps following me! I have lost my identity. I want to feel loved once again! Please help me find myself!”, I cried out as I tried to look up.
At that very moment, I saw a shining hand descending from the roof. It was so bright to the extent that I lost my consciousness. I fainted.
The beeping sounds from various machines woke me up. I opened one eye after the other. All I saw were wires, drips, screens and lights. I was in a hospital bed. I tried to raise my head but I could not because some sort of case was around my neck. I saw an old man standing on my right-hand side. The old man held my hand and said, “Congratulations! You got your light back. Use this chance to light up your world and that of those you meet on your path!”
Before I could open my mouth to talk, the old man smiled and disappeared. The beeping got louder. I heard some voices approaching me. I tried to move my body but I could not, because of the scorning pains in my shoulders and spine. I could also smell urine.
“This is impossible! He is alive!”, said one of the nurses at my bedside to the Doctor who was busy examining me. “We have already finalized the papers for the mercy killing. His family had already agreed to donate all his good organs!”
The surprised nurse kept on talking to the doctor as they removed some wires and tubes from my body. I could hardly keep my eyes open, but my ears were very active.
“I would call this a miracle because no one can explain this medically. He could not breathe or live without the life support, but now, he seems perfectly healthy”, said a male voice, I assume to be the doctor. “Some people get second chances at life!”
- SHOOT YOUR SHOT: http://valtoybob.com/shoot-your-shot/
- RONKE: http://valtoybob.com/ronke/
- RONKE II: http://valtoybob.com/ronke-ii-heart-over-head/
- EVERYONE versus RONKE: http://valtoybob.com/everyone-versus-ronke/
- RONKE: The Queen Of Ibadan: http://valtoybob.com/ronke-the-queen-of-ibadan/
- RONKE THE RUNAWAY BRIDE: http://valtoybob.com/ronke-runaway-bride/
- SATISFIED: TALE OF A JOHNNY JUST COME: http://valtoybob.com/satisfied-tale-johnny-just-come/
- NEVER ALONE: http://valtoybob.com/never-alone/
- LETTER TO LINDA: http://valtoybob.com/letter-to-linda/
- IF EVE LEAVES: http://valtoybob.com/if-eve-leaves/
- DREAM CHASERS: http://valtoybob.com/dreamchasers/